A Final Farewell

It makes me sad to be writing this last blog about South Africa. This trip has completely changed the way I think about nearly everything. It was an experience of a lifetime.

My decision for choosing Africa, if you ready one of my first entries, may have just been a process of elimination, but I now believe I was meant to go there. I was meant to go to the AIDS Haven and help those children, I was meant to see the combination of rich and poor living so close, I was meant to have certain experiences with people that left me in tears. I know it may sound weird, but there isn’t any other way to explain it.

I had always been known as a quiet one yet my decision to go to Africa wasn’t a surprise to anyone, even if I did get a few strange looks from people and a couple “Why not Europe?”’s. I’m always up for an adventure and (though I didn’t come in with expectations...) I expected Africa to give that to me, to challenge me in ways I have never been challenged before, to put me in uncomfortable situations and have to deal with them, to communicate with people I had nothing in common with, and to make new friends. I’m glad to say, South Africa did not disappoint.

I arrived in Africa on my first day, in spite of being exhausted, wide-eyed and ready for the adventures to begin. Everything was new to me. I missed the familiar, my family and friends, my house and dog, Alexandria and school, but I was too excited for that to last very long.

My first impressions were mixed, to say the least. I had just been travelling for 36 hours and I step out of the PE airport, its hot, I’m hot, and I smell. Not the best combination in the world. I rode to Langerry with Vilma (who I thought was the nicest lady but had no idea who she was and so I didn’t talk all that much) and as we go around a curve I saw we were on top of a hill overlooking the ocean. I could not believe where I was. The place was so beautiful, and I hadn’t even seen the best of it. Walking into Langerry was surreal, though it may have been the lack of sleep, and I was so glad I travelled so light. I barely made it up the stairs with my stuff. The one good thing about being the first in an apartment is picking which room you get to have, and Melissa and I chose well – I will probably never have a room with a balcony again (sorry Amy for never switching). I had no idea what PE would be like so I can’t say I was surprised by what I saw or not. I figured South Africa had a poverty problem and that cities are a perfect example. But I was surprised to see how closely the third world and first world are to each other here. We lived in a very tourist part of the city, but take a five minute car ride and you could be in run-down apartment buildings; take another five minutes and you see the townships and the shacks.

I have to admit that I was nervous when other people started showing up. I had been travelling with the same five girls and along so well with them all that I was anxious about how well I’d get along with the rest of the group. As I said before, I’m a terribly shy person around new people, and, like everyone else, I wanted them to like me. I was also worried about how well 30 people could get along for 3 ½ months living so close to each other and wondering if we would be at each other’s throats by the end.

Needless to say, most of my first impressions are not the ones I leave with and all my worries were for nothing. I left South Africa with a whole new understanding to life and the world that we live in. Never again will I look at poverty or race the same way again. I will never take for granted anything that I have because most people in this world don’t have the same luxuries I do. One incident in particular drove this point home to me. I went running most days along the beachfront. One morning I saw this one man kneeling on the ground. As I got closer I could see that he was scraping ice cream that had been dropped the night before with a stick and eating it; he was just so desperate to eat something. I nearly broke down to tears. It took me a while before I could fully understand what I saw and it still affects me when I think about it. People shouldn’t have to do that. This is the same man that goes through all the garbage’s in the morning looking for something to eat. He carries around a plastic bag that holds all he has in life. Everything I have is a gift. When people complain about not having the latest shoes or cell phone I’m going to think about this man and wish that this person could see him too, maybe then they’d stop complaining.

As Gary explained before we even left CSB/SJU, we would run into the issue of race and racist people. Coming from small town Minnesota, diversity is having one black kid in your graduating class. In South Africa, diversity is much greater and racism can run deep. Some people blame the blacks for everything that is going wrong in their country. One white South African that I talked to said that whatever the black people want, they get. The government is black and so they need to help their people, and to do this they just tax the white people. The blacks do not need to pay for electricity or water if they don’t feel like it. He just kept going off on this for an hour. I guess I understand why he is thinking this but the problems of his country run deeper than this. Having had the experience of being a minority in a country and being treated differently because of the color of my skin, race is an entirely different issue to me now. I will notice it more and how people react to diversity. I’m not sure if that is a good or bad thing.

I have to talk about how my time at the AIDS Have has affected me. Before, I was not much of a little kid person. I didn’t know how to talk to them or keep them entertained for 3 hours and was worried they wouldn’t like me. After, I love kids. I think anyone who didn’t like kids would just have to spend a couple of hours with these kids to change. All of these kids will never have a normal childhood. They live in an orphanage where one-on-one attention was nonexistent until we got there. Most live with the stigma of having HIV or AIDS. As Sandra (one of the most frustrating people I have met) said all the kids at the Haven have either been infected or effected by AIDS. Some were abandoned and still have parents – just a short aside, the mother of one little boy came one of the last days we were there and when one of the girls tried to hand him off to her he started crying and wouldn’t go to her, heartbreaking – others are true orphans, while still others are orphans and were abandoned by other family members. Despite all of this, they are happy, energetic little kids that completely exhaust us every single day we volunteered. Their sickness does not slow them down one bit. Most are developing (physically and mentally) normally and with a few of them you couldn’t tell that they had HIV or AIDS (we found out later that some that we thought had the disease didn’t). HIV/AIDS is not a death sentence, just look at these kids and you’d be able to understand how full a life can be.

Finally, I have to talk about the 29 fantastic people I got to share this unbelievable experience with. I did not have to worry about how well we would get along. Spending nearly 4 months together brought us closer than I could have ever expected. These people are like my family now, some of them I know better than some members of my family (oh and Joe and Melissa, if you think I have a weird family dynamic you should have been at my Grandpa’s 70th birthday party yesterday, you would have been blown away by the strangeness that occurred). The potlucks we had were perfect. I didn’t think college students could cook so well. Some I got to know well because I lived with them or had an amazing travel experience with them (especially Bulungula and Lesotho) others I got to experience the extreme stress that was Marine Biology with. I am going to miss so much about these people. I’m going to miss Joe coming into our room all the time because he got locked out and had to climb across the balcony. I’m going to miss the conversations with Nick (especially when he’s had a few…). I’m going to miss running around from room to room looking for our nonstick pan only to find it in the room down the hall (thanks Flat 6). I’m going to miss Amy running about 5 times a day. I’m going to miss the get well cards made by Laura and the crafts that would be made in Flat 14. I’m going to miss the music that would be blaring from the room next door and Jenny running to sing about freeing a whale. There is something about everyone on this trip that I am going to miss. My roommates were amazing and put up with me going to bed early I could not have asked for a better group to live with. Thank you to everyone who made this trip the best experience I have had in my life I will never, ever forget any of you.

Peace.

Almost Gone...

My time in South Africa is almost gone and I can’t believe it.  The day after tomorrow I will be boarding a plan and 36 hours later I will be back in Minnesota.  I am definitely going to miss this place.  It has become like a second home to me – the complete mess that is our apartment should testify to that.  I hope my adjustment back into the United States goes smoothly – I have heard some horror stories.

I am finally finished with school here.  My last final ended about an hour ago.  I feel bad for those who have two finals tomorrow…ok no I don’t.  My biology final went as well as could be expected with two very condescending people running it.  I definitely won’t miss the lecturers.  Music went really well considering I had been sick the entire night before and I didn’t study more than an hour for it.  So, from now on, whatever happens, happens. 

On Saturday night, our entire group had a farewell party.  Everyone had an amazing time and there were a few tears shed by some in the group.  We had a braai (again) and saw a couple slideshows (one embarassing, one sentimental) had a speech and an awards show.  It kind of felt like I was back in the sixth grade again.  During the party, I began to realize how close we have all become and how much I am going to miss everyone.  So sad.

For my South African Literature class we began discussing about going home and how we are going to communicate our time here in South Africa.  At this time I realized how I am not going to be able to tell people how much this trip has changed me.  I have seen things that I wish I never had to see, I have seen more people beg in the last week than most people in the US will see in years, I once even saw a man scrape off icecream from the ground with a stick so he could have something to eat – never have I been so close to tears about what I have seen here.  Every morning I go running, I see this same mand and wish I could do something to help him.  I won’t be able to communicate these feelings correctly when I tell my friends and family.  No matter how detailed I have been in this blog, or how detailed I will be in retelling my time here, they cannot get the full effect.  At the same time I don’t want to go home and just tell everyone South Africa was ‘amazing.’  I have used that word too many times and I know people won’t be satisfied with that answer.  But what I have begun to understand is simplisity is best.  When retelling stories, chances are I won’t go through all the details, I won’t give you the full version, sorry but you just won’t get it.  I now that is not what people want to hear.  I wish I could make you all understand. 

So I might write one more blog before I leave just as a summary of my time here.  I hope you have enjoyed reading this as much as I have enjoyed writing it.

Peace.

I'm running out of title names

I have very little tiime left in South Africa, and I am very sad about that.  The other night I nearly jumped out of bed when I realized I will be sleeping in my own bed in two weeks.  It kind of scared me.  I am going to miss the ocean being right across the street and being able to go to it whever I feel like it, the potlucks our awesome group has put together throughout the semester, the scarey monkeys on campus, the kids at the AIDS Haven, the experience of living in a foreign country, absolutely everything (except maybe my cooking, I’m ready for some home cooked meals).  I feel as if there is a lot I haven’t done, I need more time and that is something I don’t have. 

So we finally had our exciting shark dive this last weekend.  We went on Saturday morning at 7am.  Now that it is staying darker longer, getting up before 7 is really hard (it used to be hard to stay asleep after 6 because of the stupid sun shining into the room).  Within five minutes I went from laying asleep in bed to riding on a truck on the way to the harbor.  Not everything went that smoothly, though.  The swells were a little larger than expected (and by a little I mean a lot).  The dive site was right outside the bay next to an old ship wreck.  Well, it was high tide, the swells were huge, the sunken ship was creating some of the biggest waves I have seen since coming here, and the dive site was about 5 meters from the boat.  Since the instructor didn’t feel like risking our lives, we decided to head to a smaller wreck in the bay where the swells wouldn’t be so hard.  I was fine with that.  One problem, they couldn’t find the wreck.  Now that option one and two were out we were left with going out to a bouy and seeing the reefs and fish out there.  We did get to see our sharks.  They weren’t huge, probably just 5 feet in length, or something like that, and we saw quite a few of them.  I don’t know what some of the fish were thinking but they were following us and swimming among us.  It was amazing.  I guess I’m going to miss being able to see this type of stuff back at home too.  My scuba certification is going to be gathering dust.

We have one graduating senior in our group (Justin) and since he could not make it to his graduation, we decided to hold one for him.  It was so funny.  He didn’t know a thing about it and we had set everything up on the roof; it looked almost real.  He got a gown and cap, flowers, someone said a prayer, someone wrote, a poem, his hysterical mother (someone from our group played his mother) was wailing, he gave a have drunken speech and almost cried.  Everyone had a great time.

Volunteering at the Haven has been really fun the last couple of weeks because we have bascially given up doing much constructive stuff with the kids and we don’t really want to punish them anymore because we won’t get to see them.  At times it has been a bit hectic.  I wish I had more time with some of these kids.  We were sent there to get them ready for school or help them along with their development.  All of the kids have shown tremedous improvement.  Siya, a boy about a year and a half (I’ve talked about him before), wouldn’t talk, smile, or do anything back in Februayr.  Now everytime we walk into the nursery he gives us his sly smile and runs to us.  He will smile at anyone now for any reason.  He walks, talks a little, and plays with other kids.  All of the kids have made improvements as impressive as this.  I just wish we could be there longer to experience more of it. 

I have been up to my earlobes in homework these last couple of weeks and it doesn’t look as if it is going to let up any time until after my last final.  The only thing keeping me from going crazy is knowing the faster I get done with my papers the faster it will all be over.  The other night I spent five hours working on two papers, for lit and sem, while the rest of the group went to a braai out in the townships.  I got the papers done but then the next two days I worked non stop on another paper, this time for biology.  Speaking of biology, we got to take our first test over and if I did not get at least an 80% on it I am going to be very disappointed.  The questions we were given I knew better than the first test, I wrote a ton on each question, and I gave all the information that was given to us in our study packet.  I can’t wait to get it back.

Like how I’m mixing up the serious with the not serious paragraphs here.  I don’t want to overload you too much on the sentimental stuff.

Anyway, my homework is calling me…

Peace. 

Two weeks (about) to go...

I can’t say a whole lot has happened in the last week. Every day is sort of running into the next one. I have too much homework to do to go out on the weekends so I haven’t gone anywhere since spring break (the fact that I have little money left is also helping that along). Though I may be going to Tsitiskama this next weekend and go bungee jumping off a bridge. We’ll see how that goes

Classes at school are not too exciting. I’m getting really tired of the three hour classes. About an hour through them I get really antsy or really bored. I get a lot of homework done in class though, thanks to that. The crisis that is Marine biology is soon to be over, I think. A couple of us, me included, notified Gary about how horrible we did on the first lab write up and how we pretty much all failed the test we took last Thursday. When I talked to him in Sem class about it he said he had “opened up a dialog with Ronel.” That made me feel somewhat better. Gary isn’t going to let us all fail a class, it wouldn’t look good to those who would want to go on this trip in the future. Well, the outcome of that is a retake of the test this upcoming Thursday and a re-write of our first lab write up. I am going to be working my butt off to get good grades on those. I have another lab write up I have been working for hours on. On Thursday I ran out of Internet at school, which is extremely hard to do, researching and downloading material for this next paper, that was about 3 and a half hours. Friday I worked on it pretty much all day until I ran out of stuff to write about. I am sick of it and never want to talk about rocky shore zonation again.

We had another birthday on Wednesday. So, as a surprise, we had a braai. That was quite possibly the best meal I have had all trip. There was pasta salad, corn (gotta have a little touch of home), grilled potatoes, hamsbok steak, and fish that was left from the guys’ fishing expedition. Someone mentioned about how expensive that meal would have been if it were being eaten at a restaurant back at home. You can’t easily get hamsbok in the States. I have to say they guys on this trip, at least a few of them, are some of the best cooks I know. I’m glad they’re here to cook me food J.

There was another public holiday on Friday. I’m not sure what it was. They seem to have a lot of them here. I’m not complaining.

This weekend was supposed to be exciting with shark diving and penguin island hopping. Well, it didn’t really turn out that way. Friday we were supposed to go dive with the sharks but the swells were huge and the visibility really poor. (All the fishing boats were in the harbor and it had something to do with these conditions, I have no idea why but it looked cool). At first we were told 7:30, so I got up and was ready by that time. Someone forgot to tell us that the timed changed to 1. But it didn’t matter, conditions were too bad. So diving would have to wait until Sunday, supposedly. Saturday morning I got up at 7 thinking I would have to be ready by 8 to go to St. Croix Island to see the penguins. Well, the same conditions as the day before prevented us from going. This was the second day in a row that I had gotten up and for no reason. Finally Sunday was supposed to be the good day. We actually did get up to go to the Island, at 5:30. Needless to say I was not a happy camper. The Island was cool but a little anticlimactic. We did get to see a ton of dolphins swimming right next to the boat. Diving for the day was cancelled and rescheduled for Friday. I’m crossing my fingers.

I come home in two weeks…ahhhhhh.

Peace.